pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize