He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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