You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
