so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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