I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm drive I can fine osifer
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
