I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
