piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
