There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
