I wanna bring you to show and tell
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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