You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
