The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
a search helicopter?!
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
