i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
