i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
