Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
should my penis look like a turkey
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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