Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
