Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
This can only be settled by a dance off.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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