do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I think a kid would responsible me up
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
