What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize