ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
