So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
