She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
