i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
