Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I don't deserve a penis
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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