this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
