CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
