@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
