Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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