Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Randomize
