Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
