Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
