She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
