everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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