I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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