My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
