I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize