Don't you send me to vm
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
