It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
