she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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