I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
