It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize