you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
