i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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