is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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