This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
