do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
