My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
why is half of my head shaved?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
