I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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