Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
