just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
