I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
